Tits Only

by nicolecallihan

Wandering around the breastfeeding store yesterday, I saw the onesie: “TITS ONLY,” it read, and hmm, I thought, wow, tits only. That’s one way of putting it.

I must admit that in the past eight weeks I’ve felt like little more than a gigantic boob. Baby crying? Give her the boob. Baby gnawing on hand? Boob time. Baby licking her lips? Pass the milk, please.

And maybe it’s just me (like when you buy an El Camino and then see them everywhere), but I also feel like breastfeeding is all over the news. It’s apparently no longer allowed to post breastfeeding pictures on Facebook (as if I want Tom Ford from eleventh grade English seeing that much of me. Sorry Tom!). Then there was the whole pumping story in the New Yorker which gave fodder to intellectual mom’s groups everywhere. And just yesterday, on cnn.com, a whole slew of “ireporters” were giving their two cents about breastfeeding in public.

It’s funny because in my neighborhood in Brooklyn, you’re more likely to be looked down upon for pulling a bottle out in a restaurant than a boob. Really. Everyone gets very sanctimonious about breastfeeding, and while I know “breast is best,” I can’t help but look in the mirror at my formula-fed self and over at my formula-fed husband and around at my many formula-fed friends and wonder about all the hullabaloo. I know women who put themselves through inordinate amounts of pain (the woman who had her inverted nipples “sucked out” before leaving the hospital comes to mind) and still feel self-conscious about not being uber-feeders.

I could go on and on (but baby needs boob!). Anyone want to shed a little light on this? How do you feel about breastfeeding in public? Breastfeeding on Facebook? Breastfeeding in general? I know your formula-fed minds are IQ-deficient but surely you can think of something!